yea man.
it's me again.







guess wat ??
i gave up my comfy to the core bed.
i gave up my dear room.
i gave up my dear pillow.
i gave up my dear bolster.
to stayover at sam's house.

LOL.
lame.
argggggggh.
narthing is well for me now.
feeling pain in the throat again and i'm not gonna see him tml.
this sux.
hur.
and he's gonna slp le.
cant even talk.
fri din even talk cos i was SICK.
sat talked half day the rest of the nite was nth.
today din even talk till evening.
WTH.
dun like life like this.
not even the way i want.
all i look forward to ...
i dun get it.
trust me.
i wont get what i want.
NEVER IN MY LIFE.

- i dun wanna slp
becos i dun wanna stop thinking bout u
dun wanna stop missing u
dun wanna stop talking to u
dun wanna stop picturing u in my mind
i dun wanna stop huggin the pillow thinking it's u -

i love you..
sumtimes i think u have stopped loving me.
K WADEVER.
LIKE I CARE.
ok i do care :D
LAME.
haiii.
ok dun think i shld write all this here.
i've had enough thinking bout it.
it's not time i wanna start writing it out.
HAHA.

sumtimes think i'm not even anything im this world
like not even the size of dust or anything.
cos i think i'm lame.
i think i'm stupid.
i think i'm ugly.
i think i sux sumtimes.
i think i shld die sumtimes.
i think i am hopeless.
i think i irritate the hell out of ppl.
i think i'm making ppl hate me.

LOL.
hate myself at times.
dunno why too.
used to really love myself so much.
dunno why the love faded.
mayb other ppl's love for me will fade like the love for myself.
cos i dun even love myself.
why would ppl bother to love me.
i sux anyway rite.
HA.

see my attitude again.
huR.
i'm so damn irritated by the ache in my shoulders.
i nit painkillers man.
HAHA stupid.
wadever.

wish ppl can stop leaving me...
when i wanna talk.
huR.
nvm. all cos of my attitude.
rite, AGAIN.
fine.
bye bye.














sam is stroking her hair again.
i like it when she does that.
make me feel like she nv changed.
i hate changes.
dun make me think u changed.
i will freak out.
to the limit.
how i wish u can do what u used to always do.
but u dun anymore.
cries to the world .
come back to me the old you.
the old me.
i want it back.
can i ?
i dun think so.
it's gone with the wind.
nv be back.
will things work out den?
i've no idea.
i'm feeling so down now.
i wish i'm sick again...
u know why...
u know.
i know too.































my shoulders ache like hell.
chop them off if u are wiling to.
they irritate the hell out of me.
basically, everything bout me.. irritates the hell out of me.
i dun like life.
it's just smth that make me exist in this world that nobody is treating me like i exist.
u are my everything.
life is not my everything.
dun u understand ?
u are more important than my life.
that's wat i mean.
u know ?
mayb i'm living cos i have no courage to die.
mayb i'm living to find the last source of happiness i might find in the world.
mayb i'm living to find the last source of hope i might find in the world.
mayb i'm living to find u and me back.
mayb i'm living to find my fire back.
mayb ...
i dunno
i dun wanna admit life is happy.
life is not.
life sucksnow.
cos i'm not happy now.
cos u are not happy now.
smiles.
i hope i dun irritate the hell out of u again.
i never ever meant to.
cos i always love you.
(((:

























hugggs.
lovees from me.
your junny.