Jun.sigh... i did it.
hello? there is no problem ald. there is no problem ald! i kept telling myself over and over and over and over and over again. over and over again.
"u settled it. there's no problem ald."
ok,fine. though i dun 100% confirm that there's no problem ald but at least for the time being, there's no problem right?
YES. but i dunno why, my heart jus keep saying ouch. i so wish it will stop. mayb stop beating.
den i dun have to think bout all this anymore argh :(
gal, u did the right thing ald. YOU DID THE RIGHT THING. YOU DID IT.
so?
ok, mayb i shld go and die after all. i deserve it, dun i?
argh. i wanna say i cant take it anymore. but naahh, it's not smth i will say. at least, i will jus pretend i can take it. rite ? ya, obviously i so cannot take it ald now. wanna and will cry any moment. but, ahhhhh, i dun deserve to cry. i dun even deserve to feel sad or anything. it's almost like all my fault. hahahahhaa, if only i dun exist at all. if only...
if only.but i dun wanna care anymore man. dun wanna care bout how i'm feeling now. i dun care whether i advise ppl and feel hurt in the end. i dun care whether i look very ok now and noe will feel all the pain only later on and most probably at night. i dun care whether i feel anything anot. i dun care whether i can really take it anot. i simply dun care. i have to take it. i
have to. i have no other choice. thanks for telling me " if u cant take it ald tell me ah. " . really thanks. but, i think i can take it. i will take it, alone. alone la. take it alone. have to. and...
i'm starting to feel abit pain ald. pain. like knife stabbing at my heart. stabbing and stabbing. the more i live on, the more deep i'm stabbed. stab and stab. stab and stab. still stabbing. yawn. but nvm la. i can jus go home and cry pain away. after all, it's jus pain. not like i never feel pain before. i'm ok. gal, it's jus pain. take it. take it.
take all pains and utter no words? i so deserve it.
Jun_yes yes yes. all my fault. all my fault. all my fault. all my fault. all my fault. all my fault. ahhhhhhh. wtf. my world is ending. i cant do anything anymore. i will be dead very soon.
