well, i wanted to say so many many things with good mood, den i read some argh :'( stuffs. now i lose the mood to even live. oh watever lor.

my last sat and sun:)

saturday night concert [craps]
ya i cried all the way to the bus stop and i dunno wad i was crying bout. so i went home, slp for awhile den woke up to go to the concert. fuck. late. haha. meiying, theo and cadence waited for like quite long for me, so paiseh :x it's really funny sia, to see my cello teacher dressed so formally, bow tie. HAHA. four songs by SAF MDC orchestra. super nice man. there were instrments like oboe, piccolo,clarinet,flute,bassoon,trumpet,french horn,trombone,double bass,viola,violin and of cos.......... CELLO:) it feels extremely weird actually, how you go to concerts and watch your CELLO teacher perform, but u see him playing all sorts of instruments EXCEPT cello. haha. we all saw him play gaohu before. and this time,we see him playing violin. cadence and me were shocked man, when he went onto stage with violin in hand. ok, apparently, we din noe our dear teacher plays the violin :l haha.

dance of the yao tribe.
the four songs by the orchestra. spring festival overture, dance of the yao tribe, lan hua-hua[erhu concerto], joyous news from beijing. ahhhhhhhhh. dance of the yao tribe. my fave can. somehow, violin as a replacement for erhu is better. that's my opinion la,theo thinks erhu is better. na,i think violin sounds nicer for this song. i dunno y, but this song make me feel alot. goosebumps and all:) well, this song by right depicts how people from the yao tribe celebrate their festive seasons with singing and dancing. huh? lol. i feel sad when i listen to the song. ok,watever it is, whatever song that make me feel sad,must be a good song. ok, whatever la, haha. whether i feel sad or wad shit when i hear the song, i jus love dance of the yao tribe. i rmb the very first time my cello teacher played the melody of this song on cello for me to hear, i fell in love with the song. i watched braddell heights community club chinese orchestra concert DVD, they played that song too, i was dying to hear more. SAF MDC concert, i'm totally head over heels in love with this song. dance of the yao tribe. i cant get it out of my head, like how i cant get u out of my head.

after concert.
ummm, after the concert we went home. the chat from singapore conference hall to the mrt and on the mrt on the way back was nice. love talking to cad,theo and meiying. we dun talk bout sad stuffs. we only talk bout funny stuffs, ridiculous stuffs, lame stuffs, stupid stuffs. anything but sad stuffs:) love their presence that night. so meiying and cad alighted at tampines. theo and me alighted at pasir ris. and somehow, i chose to walk home from the interchange. rather than take bus. yay.

night walk after concert.
1030pm night walk. alone and i start to do stupid things. cross roads without waiting for green light, without looking left and right. seeking death? na, those are quiet roads. jus attitude dun wanna turn my head. unfortunately, no cars knocked me down. haha. well, i dun get things in my life. i WAN to get knock down, so it means no matter what i WONT. hahahaha, wat attitude sia me.

jus attitude.

my wish:)
the walk home was nice. alone. i walked and walked and i stopped at that place where u told me that stupid idiotic gal saw red ants and freaked out. *roll eyes. haha, ya that place. i looked up at the sky and all i saw, was a single star. i rmb ther telling me if i see only one star, i can make a wish and the wish will come true. well, so, there, in the middle of nowhr, i made a wish. the star wasn't shining brightly or anything, guess my wish wont come true :'( if my wish come true, i will tell you guys:)

after making my impt wish, i went to seven eleven to buy chips. my dinner, haha. that's the end of my night walk. my very attitude night walk.

stupid ah bengs.
ohh, i hate those stupid ugly ah bengs walking ard at night. so act cool, think they look very good sia, make me wanna puke. gimme that stupid ah beng look like they wan to kill me. ass lor, i never even offend them or anything. so ugly like shit still wan to roam the streets at night. wearing their stupid ah beng clothes, giving those wan-to-fight-izzit looks. they should go get a life man. dickheads. and also those outside seven eleven with their stupid bikes. tink they very cool man, sit there eat, dirty the floor. wth, feel like kicking them. ooops, bikes. reminds me of ian. na, ian definitely not like those ah bengs. ian is nice:) ahhaha.

sunday evening walk.
one whole day alone at home totally make me wanna kill myself. so bored, so soul-destroying. 630pm, it started to rain heavily. really very heavily. strong wind and heavy rain. yay! evening walk in the rain:) wearing shorts and that over-sized pahang camp shirt, i flew out of my house with an umbrella. wind was super strong like siao. but very strangely, i walked out into the open, took about ten steps, think to myself "ahhh, so freaking cold." then the rain stopped. ok, it din stop. it lightened. so dramatically,instantly after i thot " ahhh, so freaking cold." the heavy rain reduced to a drizzle. those pathetic drizzles which i dun even consider rain. ya, i even stopped using the dumb umbrella. so i walked in the rain. oh my gosh, so nice man walking in drizzle. how rain drip down my face, how my hair is wet, how i stroll along the road alone, how my over-sized pahang camp shirt is slightly wet also. nice. so nice it's beyond description. well, the only unnice part is that i was limping. that idiotic cut on my toe, so freaking painful. haha, dumb. so, if u saw a gal wearing shorts and over-sized pahang camp shirt, holding an umbrella but not using it, limping along a road at pasir ris, smiling to herself, or sobbing as she walked. that's jun:) that's me.

i thot... mayb the heavy rain was reduced to a drizzle because u know i'm feeling cold. because u love me. well, i thot. now, i dun think so. u dun:)

i guess u dun love me:) and mayb u should believe me for once.

and i'm falling again,nobody will break my fall, fuck :( but dun worry. i can fall and break ur fall. that is... if u ever will wan me to be there to break ur fall. this sounds very retarded. but yes. if u ever will want...

sam got into second round. wth la, so pro. go for it, sam. i will support u:) and i'm not sad. i can take it man. what dun kill me make me stronger. i'm still alive and kicking. have the energy to go for co pract in half an hours time and night walk after co pract. ok? i'm still alive means i can still take it. the day when i say i really cant take it = the day i'm dead. literally dead.
Jun_
i love ashin:) and i miss you alot. alot alot.


to that cute friend who threatened to throw away the fox company brown jacket belonging to my sis_ miss talking to you and going out with you. and i really hate saying bye to you. i dun wan to :'( hahaaha. and guess it's gonna be ages before i see u again man. so please take care!

to that friend who smsed me and asked wat is troubling me while i was watching the concert on sat_ thanks man, i noe u care bout me. love ya! HHAHA.

to that friend who always call me brother_sigh.. i'm sighing away man :'(

to that friend who always say AWESOME nites!_stop going away la wth. hahahaha. hope to see you soon!

to that friend who is unhappy bout work_hope work is ok:) you asked me to be there for my good friend. that good friend ah? but.... i think that good friend dun nit me at all. and it's so depressing how i nit that good friend but that good friend is not here for me :( well, that good friend dun nit me. rite? dun u agree? ok, i'll leave.

i left.